New Shoes

II
 bought new shoes for the film festival. I had meetings. I’ve heard there’s a certain (low) expectation of a screenwriter’s appearance among film executives. Despite this I’m pretty sure that as low as your expectations of someone’s appearance, I can dip lower.

This isn’t self deprecation. I’m nothing if not objective. I just couldn’t care less about what I’m wearing as long as it’s comfortable. To the point, it can be noted, that people have on occasion taken me aside and asked if I’m aware of the holes in my shirt. Not at a business meeting mind you. I work at home so “work clothes” has never been an issue. But I get it. There’s a not so unfounded correlation people make between shabby dress and poor hygiene. And generally poor hygiene can be correlated to some deeper  red flags about self-awareness, responsibility, even mental stability. Not a great recipe for business partnerships. My hygiene, however, is and always has been beyond reproach. But explaining all of this is not the way I want to start a meeting, thus: New Shoes.

All this to say, I was faced with crafting my version of what “a writer” should look like. But here’s the thing; if I’m going to be starting from scratch, defining myself for the first time, I don’t want to be defined only as a writer. Trite as it may sound, I’m a director, an editor too for that matter. Complete storyteller I would hope. Writing just seemed like the best way to pursue “breaking in”.

So the question was what shoe defined me as a well rounded filmmaker? And could I even believe I was having this inner monologue? I wanted to punch myself in the face. But this isn’t my world… Gotta keep reminding myself of that. Gotta don the camouflage.

Something business casual. Comfortable. No laces. Unremarkable would be great. Took me half a dozen shoe stores to find them. I know far too much about shoes now.

It was the most I’ve thought about apparel since buying my current shoes roughly 22 years ago. At that time I wanted something I could wear to school but also use to hike up mountains. The metaphor for my current situation is not lost on me.

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Filed under Misadventures, The Journey

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