Maybe that’s just part of getting older. Maybe it’s part of not yet having accomplished all that I want. I do a review. Count all the items on my list that remain unchecked.
The holidays bring it out. Can’t help but exacerbate the self reflection. It’s because of the gatherings. Friends, family, dinners, parties…
I was never voted anything in highschool. Nothing I remember, anyway. Certainly not most likely to succeed.
A few years ago, after a few glasses of wine, one of my best friends told me something. He said that on another occasion, (undoubtedly after another bottle of wine), he and another BFF of ours made a conclusion amongst themselves. They concluded that the only person within our tightly knit and enduring gang who would ever be capable of making any real money was me.
My Good Will Hunting moment. A sweet and tragic disclosure. My friends are guys who work for a living. Nine to five, void-of-fulfilment work. They’ve got their lives mapped out. Mortgage, kids, retirement. Drinks once a month with the old gang.
What my buddy was telling me was that I was the guy they were counting on to get out. To make it.
And now it’s the holidays. Friends, family, dinners, parties…
For the past five or six years, every gathering I’ve attended with my friends has come with a special announcement. Someone is either pregnant or buying a house. Every year.
Except this year. This year everybody’s kind of set. Mortgage, kids, saving for retirement.
And here I am… Standing with a glass in my hand. Nodding. Nothing new to report. An option agreement in negotiation. A negotiation that’s just dragging out. Can’t imagine it won’t go to the new year now. May never amount to anything anyway.
The get-togethers roll by. I see them coming and I keep hoping this will be it– Drinks on me! But nope. Standing and nodding.
My past is full of successes and failures. That’s life. And it’s enough when it’s your own private struggle. It’s something different when you’re apparently the mostly likely to succeed.